So when I saw that Harry was reading his new memoir, Spare (2023) ghostwritten by J.R. Moehringer, I figured it would be a good audiobook for me. And it was pretty interesting. The book is relatively long and Harry goes into a lot of detail about his life. The death of his mother features prominently throughout the book. For years, young Harry would imagine that his mother was alive. He believed that she had run away to get away from the press and would come back to get him and William. I cannot even imagine being a child and violently losing my mother like that--especially under all that scrutiny.
Harry talks about growing up a royal and going to school. After high school, he spent his gap year working at a ranch in Australia and visiting Botswana. Then he moved on to the military. I had no idea that he went to Afghanistan twice, the second time as a helicopter pilot. He mentions the women he dated and became important to him, and his fight to find meaning in his life. He also discusses his mental health difficulties. After he came back from the war, he was getting panic attacks and suffered from anxiety.
Finally, Harry talks about Megan and his life with her. Their relationship seems very sweet, and I hope they stay happy together. He says that the media was constantly attacking Megan, and the palace did nothing to protect her. In fact, the media people from his father's office was feeding stories to them. Harry also mentions disagreements and fights with his brother: sometimes over Megan, sometimes over power and palace roles. In the end it all led to the rupture between Harry and Megan and the English royalty.
One very frequent theme in Spare is the loathsome paparazzi. I read one review of this book that said Harry overdid the paparazzi hate, but I can understand it. If not for the paparazzi, his mother might still be alive today. They hounded him his entire life, and broke up a number of relationships because the women he was dating couldn't stand the attention. They broke into phones, chased people down, and harassed friends and family.
As far as the relationship between Harry and William, there's not enough information for me to take sides. I listened to Harry's perspective, but I don't know William's. It does sound like familiar family drama, just on a whole other level. Family therapy would probably be great for them.
As I was listening to this book, I was primarily torn between two emotions. The first was genuine sympathy for a boy who lost his mother so young, whose family is so weird and stoic, and who has been stalked by paparazzi his entire life. I felt that Harry really cared about what people thought of him and doing good in this world. In some ways, he reminds me of my younger brother. On the other hand, I was often jealous. Harry jaunts down to Africa to meet his girlfriend or go on vacation. He decides he wants to go to Australia for his gap year and someone at the palace makes it happen. He has skiing holidays in Switzerland and other beautiful, exotic locations. (His grandmother is woken up by bagpipes when she is in residence at Balmoral Castle.) He can come across as a nice, friendly, normal guy, but he also comes from a place of such extreme privilege. I would never want to change places with him, but I deeply envy his ability to travel and go on adventures.
The last thing I noticed was what the press wrote articles on when discussing the book when compared with what was actually in the book. Spare is better than I expected after seeing some of the negative reviews and the quotes taken out of context. I guess this happens often to Harry, but it was enlightening to see it for myself.
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