#35 [2026/CBR18] Patchwork by Kate Evans

I try to read a graphic novel every once in awhile to expand my literary tastes. This year, I saw Patchwork (2025) by Kate Evans on NPR's Books We Love List and knew that I needed to read it. I love Jane Austen, and Pride and Prejudice has been my favorite book since I first read it back in college. I've heard little tidbits about Austen's life here and there, but I really don't know much about her. I figured this book would be perfect for me.

Jane Austen and her sister sewed a patchwork quilt for their mother, which is the inspiration for the title. I thought Patchwork was very well done. The drawings are beautiful--especially the full-page drawings. They really allowed me to dive into Austen's world and imagine what her life was like. In fact, I learned a lot about Austen, including her early years, her family, her connections, and how her writing was originally received. I had heard that Austen and her sister were close--much like Jane and Elizabeth in Pride and Prejudice, but I saw how important they were to each other while reading this book.

Evans often uses text from Austen's books in order to show what happened in Jane Austen's life back in the day. This is a fascinating technique because I could imagine Austen using her own life as inspiration for her novels. I am not as familiar with all of Austen's work as some, so I imagine the people that really know Austen's work would get even more out of this technique. Of course, we don't know what was actually said or thought back then, and apparently Jane Austen's sister, Cassandra, may have burnt the more interesting letters she exchanged with Jane.

In addition, Evans weaves in context of the time period. In one section of the book, Evans describes where all of the different layers of the quilt came from, including cotton from American slavery, linen from the Irish, and other textiles from the East India Company. The context was insightful, helpful, and well done.

The only frustrating thing about this book is that I occasionally found it a little hard to follow. I came in knowing so little about Austen that I sometimes wanted a little more context about her life and how we know what we know about her. In fact, this book has piqued my curiosity so strongly that I am now interested in reading a traditional biography of Austen in order to learn more.

This was a relatively quick read with beautiful pictures. There are also extensive notes in the back. I read a good portion of them, but it was a bit of a slog and I ran out of time to finish all of them. However, I would recommend this book to any Jane Austen fan.

#1 [2025/CBR17] The Ride of Her Life by Elizabeth Letts

My first book of 2025 is an audiobook that I read for my book club. I wouldn't have heard of it or chosen it on my own, but that's (partly) what book clubs are for. The Ride of Her Life: The True Story of a Woman, Her Horse, and Their Last-Chance Journey Across America (2021) by Elizabeth Letts is the story of Annie Wilkins and her horseback adventures from Maine to Hollywood, California. 

Annie was a 63-year-old farmer, on her own in Maine, and things were not looking good. After a bad illness and lingering cough, a doctor told Annie that she would not live more than two years. In addition, she could not afford the taxes on her farm and was destined to lose it. Instead of giving up and going into her community nursing home, Annie decided that she would travel on horseback to California and see the Pacific Ocean before she died. She took her trusty dog, Depeche Toi (French for hurry up--he was named by some neighboring farm boys), and her newly purchased horse, Tarzan. (Later on in her travels, Annie was able to pick up another horse to help with the load. His name was Rex.)

The threesome headed off in November of 1954, a time when cars were taking over the road and the United States was seeing a lot of change. Although Annie did not even have a raincoat or a map when she set off, the woman, horse, and dog were all tough, determined, and seemingly cheerful on their journey. Even better, Annie found that there were many folks along the way who were willing to help her out with a place for her and her animals to stay. Annie's horseback journey seemed to hit a nostalgic nerve with many people in the country.

Annie faced bad weather, a collision with a truck, and many other challenges. She took part in parades in more than one city and was followed by national news.

On the whole, this was a nice story. I love a grand adventure, and Annie courageously took her life into her own hands. Initially I was worried about the animals, who didn't choose to trek across the United States. But, according to the book, Annie cared very much for her animals, and except for accidents, they did quite well on their adventure. It was sweet and heartening to see how people took to Annie's adventure and helped her out.

However, this wasn't a favorite book for me. I often felt like I was getting a sugarcoated version of the actual story. There's very little about her earlier life or what Annie really thought about her circumstances. I don't blame Letts for this, I think she used the information she could find. I just wanted more. In addition, the book often felt repetitive. Annie would ride on horseback, find somewhere for her to stay for the night, and do the same the next day. It probably didn't help that the audiobook narrator emoted a little too much for my taste.

In some ways, Annie's choices and adventures reminded me of a 1950's version of Nomadland. Now people are more likely to travel the country in a car, but the idea is similar. Many of today's current nomads are forced into it by circumstances, but they find that life on the road is so much better than barely (or not even) affording a tiny, run down apartment. 

#39 [2024/CBR16] King: A Life by Jonathan Eig

I am a huge fan of Barack Obama's reading lists, and I usually pick up many of his suggestions. But Obama also often includes a hefty biography on his annual list, and these books are generally too much of a commitment for me. I was ready to skip King: A Life (2023) by Jonathan Eig, just because I didn't have the time, but then I figured I could listen to it on Audiobook.

I already knew the basics of King's life from school, but I'd never done any independent studying on him. Eig provides a lot of detailed information about how he grew up, when he met Coretta, and the early days before King became the powerful figure that he was. Eig also delves deeply into the FBI tapes as well as King's relationship with the FBI, which was fascinating. In addition, Eig discusses King's relationship and attitudes towards women. Although it was sometimes difficult to keep all the names straight, which is often a challenge for me with Audiobooks, I enjoyed this book. It was interesting to listen to, and I learned a lot. 

Martin Luther King, Jr. was only 39 years old when he was shot on a motel balcony in Memphis, Tennessee. He lived so much in such a short time, impacting countless people's lives and strongly impacting the United States as well as the rest of the world. He was an icon, but he was also a husband and father. His children found out their father was killed when the cartoon they were watching was interrupted with the breaking news. They ran to their mother who was on the phone, hearing the same news.

Eig hits on every known detail of King's life in this biography, beginning with his parents, and moving on to his death. Some of the most interesting information was gleaned from the FBI tapes. The FBI was covertly taping MLK for years. I had known this going into the book, but I did not know to what extent this was happening. I also didn't know that at the same time, MLK was having productive discussions with Kennedy and Johnson about the Civil Rights movement. Then they were going behind his back, gathering evidence of his womanizing and trying to sell it to newspapers to discredit him.

Even now the tapes make for an uncomfortable situation: They were a blatant and unnecessary violation of privacy. However, because of the tapes, we know so much more about King than we ever would have before. Eig liberally used them for his book, and more tapes may become available in the near future. This does not justify the FBI taping MLK in any way, but historians are getting something out of it now.

Although MLK was an inspiring, progressive man in many ways, this did not hold true in how he treated women. Coretta was very interested in being more active, but was consistently held back by MLK. Coretta knew she had to give up her career interests when she married, and she did. MLK was also a womanizer. Eig did not want the entire book to become a prurient look into MLK's sex life, but he did discuss Dorothy Cotton, a woman he worked with and had an affair with for many, many years. She was almost like a second wife. There were many other women, as well, and MLK seemed comfortable flirting with a married woman at a dinner filled with other churchmen. It's not a great look.

Sometimes I felt that Eig skipped over a little too much of King's treatment of women. I understand his point, but I also don't want the women that may have been hurt by him to be forgotten. Specifically, I found out on the Internet that the night before he died, King was supposed to meet up with Dorothy Cotton at the motel (they had rooms next to each other). He never showed up, though, because he was sleeping with another woman he'd met. Cotton had been up late waiting for King and was mad at him when he was murdered outside of her room. I was surprised that Eig did not include this in the book. He went into a fair bit of detail about the murder, and Cotton was an important person in his life. This was disappointing. 

On the whole, though, this book was interesting and informative. I'm glad I read it.

#30 [2023/CBR15] Empire of Pain by Patrick Radden Keefe

We recently read Demon Copperhead by Barbara Kingsolver for my book club. I was very impressed with it, and we inevitably began talking about the devastation of the opioid epidemic. I'm pretty sure I'd seen Empire of Pain: The Secret History of the Sackler Dynasty (2021) by Patrick Radden Keefe on book lists and recommendations. But after reading Demon Copperhead, I had a renewed interest in learning more about the specifics. It also helped that we'd already read Say Nothing by Patrick Radden Keefe, and it came highly recommended by a fellow book clubber.

The recent opioid epidemic is a huge and complex topic. Empire of Pain focuses on the pharmaceutical company that started it all with it's "slow release" pills of strong narcotics, and the greedy Sackler family owners who raked in the money. Keefe tells the story of three generations of the Sackler family, beginning with three brothers (Arthur, Mortimer, and Raymond) coming of age during the Great Depression. At first I was only impressed by the oldest brother, Arthur. He managed to get a medical degree and earn enough money for his parents to purchase a business during the Great Depression. He singlehandedly took care of his entire family under very difficult circumstances. After medical school, he worked at an asylum, not happy with the care the mental patients received. He wanted something more caring and more humane and helped develop some of the first psychiatric drugs. 

But Arthur also callously cheated on two of his wives, mostly disregarded his children, and first made his fortune by falsely advertising the uses and benefits of valium, buying the FDA along with it. His accomplishments were impressive, but he was very shady as well. Initially deeply involved in drug advertising, he secretly invested and owned the primary rival advertising firm in NYC, so he could corner the market without worrying about conflicts of interest. One thing Arthur did with this money was buy his brothers a small pharmaceutical company for them to run: Purdue Frederick.

Arthur, Mortimer, and Raymond's families expanded quickly with a number of wives and children, and they were all very rich. But Purdue Frederick was just a normal pharmaceutical company making normal profits until Raymond's son, Frederick, and Mortimer's daughter, Kathe, became involved with the idea of taking morphine and covering it in a time release capsule. The Sacklers wanted to make morphine more widely used by making it more accessible. Taking a little pill is a lot easier than injections, and they worked to change the idea that morphine is for cancer patients--saying that it's appropriate for all kinds of pain, large and small. This pill was advertised as not addictive even though they had done no clinical trials regarding addiction and had evidence to the contrary.

When their morphine pill was wildly successful, they decided to take oxycodone and do the same thing--cover it with a time release capsule, and aggressively sell it to everyone they could--as oxycontin. In their research they found that doctors erroneously perceived oxycodone as less potent than morphine even though it is at least twice as powerful. By buying doctors, FDA officials, outright lying in their literature, and aggressively pushing oxycontin with thousands of sales reps, they quickly made a fortune.

There had already been numerous indications of addiction with their morphine pill, and things only accelerated with the more powerful oxycontin. Purdue Pharma (new business) denied any kind of addiction problems, even as they said that patients might need more and more of the drug to contain the pain. They also had terms like physical dependence and pseudowithdrawal to explain away the very real addiction that people were suffering from.

When communities and families devastated by the opioid epidemic began looking into the Sacklers and Purdue Pharma, the prosecutors found a lot of damning evidence. But with aggressive lobbying, the Sacklers avoided criminal liability in the mid 2000's, instead letting the company plead guilty and pay a $600 million fine. And then they continued doing the exact same illegal practices they'd been doing before--but this time also expanding to the rest of the world.

In the end, the Sackler's were able to avoid criminal liability entirely, walking away with a large majority of the profits. In public as well as private communications, they never expressed any remorse. The most accountability they really faced was many of the museums and universities eventually took the Sackler name off of their buildings and wings when it became untenable to continue to memorialize them.

I definitely had some schadenfreude when people finally started calling out the Sackler family for their deeds. It was frustrating and fascinating to see the second and third generations of Sacklers parading around with this obscene amount of money and power they didn't earn. There were some that had nothing to do with Purdue Pharma, breaking out on their own, but they still benefitted off the many millions of dollars they received from the company each year. It was an awkward dance to watch them distance themselves from the company while refusing to acknowledge, or possibly even admit to themselves, the wrong done by that company.

I thought this book was well-written, relatively easy to follow given the subject matter, and simply an important topic to understand. Having read about Theranos and Weinstein, the way Purdue and the Sackler family avoided accountability was very familiar: buy high priced lawyers; push people around with your money; disseminate false information; and use/buy connections in the government. It's frustrating how much power a company/person can have in this supposedly equitable nation.

Highly Recommended.

CBR15Bingo: "Edibles" - because this book is all about drugs

#28 [2023/CBR15] Becoming Nicole by Amy Ellis Nutt

I went on the search for an informative book about transgender issues after an argument with my husband. We're both pretty liberal, but I'm more idealistic and he's more into political games. After a political discussion with his brother, my husband decided they'd figured out transgender politics. I disagreed with his assessment, but our argument really highlighted how ignorant both of us were on the subject [although--for the record--he was more ignorant than me :) ]

I decided I needed a book, and so my google searches commenced. Somehow I found, Becoming Nicole (2015) by Amy Ellis Nutt. Nutt is a Pulitzer-prize-winning journalist, so I figured this would be a well-researched, interesting story. 

Nutt follows the family of Kelly and Wayne Maines and their two adopted twin boys: Wyatt and Jonas. The children were adopted from a cousin in the family, but Wyatt was different from as early as two years old. Wyatt would drape towels over his head like long hair, and was displeased with his anatomy.

Kelly and Wayne didn't know what to make of it. They were a very "normal" family living in a small, conservative town. They just wanted their kids to be happy. Eventually, Kelly did some research and discovered that Wyatt might be transgender. The family faced an incredible uphill battle because Wyatt being transgender and becoming Nicole was hard on everyone. Even with a very accepting family and strong personality, Nicole dealt with gender dysphoria and other mental health struggles stemming from being born into the wrong gender's body and hiding who she was. There were also kids and adults bullying Nicole and making her transition more difficult.

In addition, Nicole's twin brother received a lot less attention, but also felt a strong need to protect his sister. Finally, Nicole's father, Wayne, had a hard time wrapping his head around the whole thing. He let Kelly deal with almost everything and for awhile absented himself from the family whenever he could. They were obviously both loving parents doing the best they could, and Nutt showing their struggles really made them feel like the average, relatable American family.

I thought this book was very good. Besides going into depth for many years of the family's life, she also included some more general information about transgender issues. I learned some things, and I was able to really feel what a struggle Nicole and her family faced. One important thing to remember, though, is that Nicole had a supportive family with some means. She had access to drugs that halted her puberty before the telltale signs of masculinity hit her, making her psychological struggles and transitioning significantly easier. As many challenges as Nicole faced, in some ways she was very lucky.

Recommended.

#cbrbingo: "Queer Lives" 

#18 [2023/CBR15] The Chimpanzee Whisperer by Stany Nyandwi with David Blissett

I found The Chimpanzee Whisperer: A Life of Love and Loss, Compassion and Conservation (2022) by Stany Nyandwi with David Blissett when I was browsing available audiobooks at my library to listen to on my commute. I was very lucky to stumble on a book that was perfect for me. I'm a huge admirer of Jane Goodall, and I've read at least one long biography of her life. I'm very familiar with her early research on chimpanzees in Tanzania, her efforts to improve the lives of chimps around the world, and her life-long focus on conservation. I was lucky enough to visit Tanzania back in 2018, and I thought it was a beautiful and fascinating country.  

This book is a memoir by Stany Nyandwi and his time spent with chimps in different countries throughout Africa. Stany worked at a number of chimpanzee sanctuaries that were a part of the Jane Goodall Institute. His ability to communicate with, take care of, and relate to the chimps was extraordinary. 

But there is even more to this story. Stany grew up in a hut in a village in the small African country of Burundi. Although I was familiar with Rwanda and the genocide and ethnic tensions between the Hutus and Tutsis, I did not know that this same dynamic was in Burundi as well. Stany is Hutu, and he went to work in Bujumbura as a "house boy" in rich, Tutsi households as soon as he was old enough. The work was indentured servitude at best, and was nothing like what Stany had been led to believe the work was like.

Finally, Stany was able to get a job cleaning cages at a chimp sanctuary in the city. The sanctuary had very limited means, but it was better than nothing. Stany eventually learned enough that he began to care for the chimps himself. Stany loved this job, but it wasn't without its struggles. He spent at least 6-7 hours walking to and from his village every day. And as the country got more violent, every commute became more treacherous. They were held at gunpoint and at least two sanctuary workers were murdered. Eventually it became too dangerous: the chimps were evacuated and Stany went with them. For years, he had no communication or knowledge of how his wife and children were doing. He was lonely and alone in a foreign country with only his work with the chimps as consolation. Stany later learned that his wife and children survived and he was reunited with them, but many members of his family had been brutally murdered.

Despite this tremendous trauma that could have understandably broken him, Stany continued to be a very gracious and loving person. Crediting religion for getting him away from alcohol, Stany continued to help chimps and the people around him. It really comes across in this book what a giving and forgiving person he is. 

In the end, the book shifts its focus back onto conservation, and what we can do to protect the chimpanzees and their habitats. This kind of thing always makes me feel powerless and frantic when I imagine the beauty of the world disappearing before our eyes as the billions of humans take over the last wild places. But you can give up or do the best you can with what you have. Both Stany Nyandwi and Jane Goodall are examples of people who have managed to be impactful against all odds. I'm very impressed by both of them. 

Also, so many conservation books that I read are from the point of view of Americans or Europeans. It was a nice change to see a book written by an African--to learn about his childhood, his country, and his struggles. It's impossible (and immoral) to save a country's animals, but ignore its people. This book was a fascinating glimpse into the extraordinary life of an amazing person, as well as a glimpse into a country that I had known nothing about.

#45 [2021/CBR13] You Never Forget Your First by Alexis Coe

You shouldn't judge a book by its cover, but sometimes the cover makes you laugh and then you decide you should read it. That was the case with You Never Forget Your First by Alexis Coe. I saw it on NPR's Best Books of 2020 List and laughed out loud. My interest was also piqued because I've recently been exposed to some George Washington history from both Hamilton the musical and Alexander Hamilton the book.

Two other things drew me to this book. First, it is written by a woman, which seemed a refreshing change from many other founding father biographies. Second, I appreciated that it was short. Even though I find George Washington interesting, I wasn't ready to devote myself to a 1,000 page tome. I can only handle those once in a while and it hasn't been that long since I read Alexander Hamilton. Clocking in at a comfortable 300 pages felt much more achievable.

I ended up listening to this book while on a road trip. I'm sure I lost some of the details with my wandering mind, but on the whole I found it interesting and informative. Of course, the downside to a manageable size is that the historical detail and discussion is somewhat limited. However, Coe managed to get through George Washington's entire life with some fascinating detail. Some of the political intricacies that I'd read in Alexander Hamilton were missing, but I thought Coe did a good job with what she decided to focus on.

One point Coe made in her book was how other historians portrayed George Washington. She stated that they often go on about his muscular thighs and vigorously defend his sexual morality and virility. George Washington never had any children of his own. He married the widowed Martha Washington who had already had two children. Coe pointed out the historians who argue that Martha Washington (the healthy woman who had already had two kids) must have become barren because it's not possible that George Washington was sterile. They also deny that George Washington may have become sterile from an STD. It was a long time ago. We don't know what happened, but blaming George Washington's lack of kids on Martha smacks of sexism, and I appreciate that Coe pointed it out. In this vein, Coe also discusses the common portrayal of George Washington's mother as an uneducated, heartless shrew, which also seems unfair when you look deeper.

Coe also devoted a chapter to George Washington and slavery, which is often glossed over in U.S. History classes. Washington was a pretty run-of-the-mill slaveholder. He had his slaves whipped, went after those that ran away, and split up families. It's true that he freed his slaves in his will, but not right away. Martha had to either die or free them herself. And slaves she owned from her first marriage were split between her children upon her death.

My least favorite part of this book was when Coe resorted to listing a bunch of facts. When Coe wrote about the Revolutionary War, she listed many of the battles, who won, and how many soldiers were killed and injured on each side. Maybe this is more informative in book form where you can skim over the list, and have some idea of the dates and number of soldiers involved. However, having someone read a bunch of numbers to you with no context is just painful and I didn't learn anything from it.

Recommended.

#27 [2019/CBR11] "Becoming" by Michelle Obama

I've decided that Michelle Obama is on the top of my list of people I'd like to sit next to on an airplane. Chris Hadfield is also on that list, and Barack Obama as well--although Michelle comes out on top. I'd obviously heard about Michelle Obama's book Becoming (2018) when it first came out, but it took me awhile to get around to it. I already had a long reading list, and I do tend to avoid political books. I picked up this one because Obama is so likable, and I knew just enough about her life to be intrigued.

And I loved Becoming. I came out of it with a better idea of Obama's life, her career, the work she did at the White House, and the way she views the world. I found her book relatable, inspiring, interesting, and optimistic. It was written well, with clear explanations and themes, but it was Obama's personality and her unique experiences that made this book so good.

Obama begins at the beginning, with her childhood and growing up on the South side of Chicago. Her parents rented the upper story of her great aunt's house, where she lived along with her older brother. I've read a lot of autobiographies by women, and they've all been really good. However, they almost always contain harrowing stories of neglect, abuse, rape, and other traumas that the author managed to persevere through. These stories are enlightening and inspiring, but they now have me expecting the worst. I didn't realize how tense I was until Obama safely made it to adulthood, and I could let out a sigh of relief. Obama didn't have a lot of money growing up, but she had a stable, loving home with parents who were good role models and ensured that she and her brother had opportunities and a good education. If only all children could be so lucky.

I perhaps related most to Obama during her time at college and law school. She was driven, and worked hard to succeed. It sounds like she went to law school because it was yet another checkbox  of success. And like me, she decided that the law may not be her calling. So, she moved on to jobs that involved working with the community. I thought Obama was incredibly brave to give up her safe, law firm job and go after something with much less security and direction. It was a learning experience to see Obama go into job interviews confidently requesting her required salary and negotiating flexibility so she could take care of her girls. I'm usually just happy to get hired at all, and any kind of salary is a bonus.

I enjoyed reading about Barack Obama through Michelle's eyes. I am even more impressed with him now. The story of them meeting and their subsequent relationship is interesting and sweet. And when Barack decided to get into politics, I could relate to Michelle's disinterest in the whole thing. I admired Obama's honesty about the stress in their marriage when their kids were young and how therapy helped them.

Finally, Obama discusses what it was like to move into the White House for eight years and live with the constant scrutiny of the public as well as the secret service following your every move. I'm pretty sure that would be my worst nightmare, but Obama handled it with strength and grace--focusing on what she could do to help others and make sure her girls had a semi-normal life.

Michelle Obama is a unique combination of a relatable everywoman and a superstar. I kept thinking I could be friends with her, and then I would remember that I am not Beyonce. Highly recommended.

#18 [2017/CBR9] "American Heiress" by Jeffrey Toobin

My book club chose American Heiress: The Wild Saga of Kidnapping, Crimes and Trial of Patty Hearst [it physically hurts me to not put a comma after "Crimes"] (2016) by Jeffrey Toobin. I remember seeing a famous picture of Patty Hearst holding a gun during a bank robbery, but I never really had a good understanding of what had happened to her. I was looking forward to learning more.

On February 4, 1974, Patty Hearst, a sophomore at Berkeley, was kidnapped at gunpoint from her home by the Symbionese Liberation Army. She was beaten, threatened, blindfolded and locked in a closet. As months went by, she slowly joined the SLA: a perfect example of the Stockholm Syndrome. She was found and arrested after nineteen months and charged with numerous crimes.

This is unquestionably a fascinating story, with a lot going on in a very tumultuous time period. Toobin does a relatively good job with presenting a lot of information in an understandable and readable format. There were many facets to this story that I simply did not understand going into it. First, I always just assumed that Hearst had been kidnapped by some foreign terrorists. Little did I know that the Symbionese Liberation Army were primarily a bunch of discontented college students--not unlike Hearst herself. In fact, Hearst became a target because she was close by and unprotected. Other targets were deemed too difficult.

Second, 1974 was five years before I was born. By the time I was aware of anything, we were well entrenched in the 80's. So, I was surprised by the violence that permeated the time period. Today we have protests and some riots that can seem pretty bad, but back then domestic terrorism and bombs were pretty common. "In 1974, [there were] 2,044 bombings, with twenty-four killed." (12)

Toobin is not my favorite non-fiction author. What bothered me most about this book was that Toobin did not always present an objective portrayal of events. For example, there is no question that Toobin hates Hearst's boyfriend at the time, Steven Weed. To be fair, Weed was Hearst's teacher at her boarding school. He hooked up with her and then they moved to Berkeley together. It is unbelievably creepy, and I don't know why this was not a bigger deal. Weed also acts reprehensibly towards Hearst and her family after the kidnapping. Talking to reporters while Patty Hearst is still missing, Weed says, "Oh, she's pretty, you know, the prettiest of any of the Hearsts' daughters. But then none of them are raving beauties. She's a bright girl, too. Not brilliant, of course, but reasonably bright." (90)

But Toobin goes after Weed for running away and leaving Hearst behind the night of the kidnapping, and that's just unfair. A group of people charge into your house, wielding guns and hitting people. There's no way he could have saved Patty. His best bet was to run and get help. I don't blame him for that.

Toobin's bias is most noticeable, however, in regards to Patty Hearst herself. It is clear that he thinks she becomes radicalized by the SLA as her kidnapping progresses and should be responsible for her crimes. Hearst was kidnapped, beaten, and threatened with death every day. Even when the SLA began treating her better, she was still facing death. She heard every day that if the police found them, they would come in shooting and kill everyone.

Toobin has very little sympathy for what she's going through, and his conclusions often don't match the facts he's just presented to us. When Patty Hearst and a friend are pulled over by a police officer before she is arrested, she said later that she was so terrified, "I had to do everything in my power to stop myself from shaking with fright." When she is finally arrested, she is so scared that she pees herself. But Toobin goes on to write, "The traffic stop provided a vivid window into Patricia's state of mind--that of a woman who preferred the drama of guerrilla war to the safety of a police cruiser." (218) Did he even read what he just wrote? She associated the police with murder and death, how could she possible think of a cruiser as safe?

I wish Toobin had been more empathetic to what Hearst had gone through. From the relationship with her teacher, to the sexual assaults that occurred while Hearst was kidnapped, to the violence and horrific conditions the SLA lived in, it was a lot. It would have added more to the story to understand the psychology underpinning her responses. Instead, Toobin mentions the Stockholm Syndrome in a couple sentences and that's about it. So, not perfect, but worth reading.

#42 [2016/CBR8] "Notorious RBG" by Irin Carmon and Shana Knizhnik

As a lawyer and a woman, you'd assume I would know more about the women on the Supreme Court than I do. Although I probably knew more about Ruth Bader Ginsburg than Sotomayor and Kagan, it was really only vague knowledge. I knew I liked Ginsburg's opinions, and I agreed with her politics. I'd also heard something about cancer and falling asleep at some inappropriate place. Unfortunately, that's about it.

I can't remember where I first saw Notorious RBG: The Life and Times of Ruth Bader Ginsburg (2015) by Irin Carmon and Shana Knizhnik, but both the topic and irreverence immediately drew me in. I was excited to learn more about such a groundbreaking woman in a fun way. With large, glossy pages, and lots of pictures, Carmon and Knizhnik provide a quick history of women in America for context, and then they focus on Ruth Bader Ginsburg's life in particular. The book is full of interesting stories, detailing Ginsburg's life from her childhood in Brooklyn to her most recent dissents on the Supreme Court. Every chapter begins with a relevant quote from the Notorious B.I.G. (with permission from his estate). This book doesn't go into as much detail as a proper biography, which sometimes left me wanting more; and the writing sometimes felt a little choppy. However, I learned so many interesting details about RBG's life, and I'm so glad I read it. I will give it five stars for content, timeliness, and originality.

I don't think I had really appreciated just how groundbreaking the career of RBG (and Sandra Day O'Connor, too--another woman I'd like to read about now) really was until I read this book. RBG partly decided to go to law school because Harvard Business School didn't accept women. When she attended Harvard, women had only been allowed in the law school for six years, and there were only nine women in her class. The Harvard dean asked the women in her class why they deserved a spot at law school over a male. At the time, RBG was embarrassed and muttered something about wanting to understand her husband's career. Wouldn't it just be delicious if she could have known the future and said, "So, I can be a Supreme Court Justice, asshole."

I also did not know that RBG was co-founder of the Women's Rights Project at the ACLU. She brought a number of important cases before the Supreme Court and had a huge impact even before becoming a judge. Once Clinton nominated RBG to the Supreme Court in 1993, there was pressure for her to downplay her role at the ACLU, which she refused.

"RBG did not apologize for the ACLU, for being a feminist, or for supporting abortion rights. 'The decision whether or not to bear a child is central to a woman's life, to her well-being and dignity,' she said simply. 'It is a decision she must make for herself. When government controls that decision for her, she is being treated as less than a fully adult human responsible for her own choices.'" (88)

Other interesting and unknown (to me) facts about RBG include a surprising friendship with Justice Scalia that involved opera outings and an elephant ride in India. Also, RBG is an incurable night owl and has her own personal trainer to stay in shape.

Perhaps most memorable for me, was the description of RBG's relationship with her husband of over fifty years, Marty, who died of cancer in 2010. The two met as undergrads at Cornell before they both went to law school. He became a rich, successful tax attorney and his outgoing, playful personality was a perfect complement to the more serious RBG. They brought out the best in each other. It sounds like they had a much more progressive relationship than was common at the time, with both adjusting their careers for the sake of the other when it mattered.

"I have been supportive of my wife since the beginning of time," he said, "and she has been supportive of me. It's not sacrifice; it's family." (98)

"The principal advice that I have gotten from Marty throughout my life is that he always made me feel like I was better than I thought myself." (99)

"...I have admired and loved you almost since the day we first met at Cornell some 56 years ago. What a treat it has been to watch you progress to the very top of the legal world!! I will be in JH Medical Center until Friday, June 25, I believe, and between then and now I shall think hard on my remaining health and life, and whether on balance the time has come for me to tough it out or to take leave of life because the loss of quality now simply overwhelms. I hope you will support where I come out, but I understand you may not. I will not love you a jot less. Marty" (6/17/10--ten days before his death). (108)

I still cannot read that last note without tearing up. It was so refreshing to read about a husband who unabashedly loved and supported his wife. Without a doubt, and not discounting her hard work and pure talent in any way, she was able to get where she was because of his him.

Finally, RBG's success was a little bittersweet since RBG had seen the same talent and drive in her mother, who would have been able to achieve so much more if she'd been born in another time.
"I have a last thank-you," she said. "It is to my mother, Celia Amster Bader, the bravest and strongest person I have known, who was taken from me much too soon," she said. "I pray that I may be all that she would have been had she lived in an age when women could aspire and achieve and daughters are cherished as much as sons." (80)

#50 [2015/CBR7] "The Emperor of All Maladies: A Biography of Cancer" by Siddhartha Mukherjee

Like most people, I find pretty much everything about cancer terrifying. It doesn't help that I've chosen a profession [Firefighter] that has all kinds of increased rates of cancer. Most of us at work don't even like to talk about it because it reminds us that the unknown and uncontrollable might hit us at anytime. So you might wonder why I chose to read The Emperor of all Maladies: A Biography of Cancer (2010) by Siddhartha Mukherjee. Every once in a while I like to delve into a thick, non-fiction book that really teaches me something. It also doesn't hurt that The Emperor of All Maladies won a Pulitzer Prize. But what had me picking this book off the shelf was some half-formed idea of knowing your enemy. If I am terrified by cancer, then I will simply learn more about it. So, did this book give me a better understanding of this vast disease, the amazing progress that's been made in fighting it, and the ridiculously complex task to continue making progress? Definitely. Did it make me fear cancer any less? Not so much.

Let me begin with my admiration for the author, Siddhartha Mukherjee. He is a father and a practicing oncologist in New York, who managed to write this intricate book that covers 500 years of medical history intertwined with politics, philosophy, and literature. He breaks down incredibly complex medical and biological processes into something I could follow. He uses personal stories of his own patients as well as patients throughout history to give a human face to the medical detail required to give the reader an understanding of the vastness of the various diseases that make up cancer. How he managed to compile so much information and make it understandable is beyond me.

Mukherjee begins his book with the story of Carla, a 30-year-old Kindergarten teacher, who'd been feeling sick for about a month and woke up with a wicked headache. Carla dropped off her three children and went to the clinic. When they drew blood for a routine blood test, it was watery and pale, barely resembling blood. It did not take long for them to confirm that she had Leukemia. She becomes Mukherjee's patient, and we learn more about her throughout the book.

This book was very dense, and I ended up reading a number of books in between as I worked on it. Even if I'd read it straight through, I think I'd have had a hard time remembering all of the specific details about doctors and exact breakthroughs. A couple of themes stuck with me, however. First, there are so many different kinds of cancer that there will be no simple cure. Even breast cancers vary so widely that what could save one woman may have no effect on another. Also, cancer is kind of ingenious in how it adapts. Even if you find a medication that is effective against cancer, there is always the risk that the cancer will adapt and become resistant to it. The newest wave of the fight against cancer seems to involve identifying cancer genes and finding medications to turn them off or on as needed. It is remarkably complex.

Second, I found it remarkable how strong personalities and medical trends affected treatment of patients. There was an American doctor, an aggressive surgeon who decided the key to stopping breast cancer was drastic, disfiguring surgery. Unfortunately, this was not true. Local surgery helps if the cancer has not metastasized. If it has already metastasized, then all the disfigurement in the world isn't going to catch all of it. But the world didn't fully understand how cancer metastasized yet, and this doctor's hold was so strong that these surgeries continued. They wouldn't allow any data to contradict their assumptions. It was infuriating. Similarly, an Asian immigrant [I think. Sorry, I told you I couldn't remember all the details] doctor made a real breakthrough in his practice, but his results were ignored and he was kind of left out in the cold. Looking back on it, we realize he was right, but at the time he did not have the power to change the medical status quo.

Finally, throughout the book there was a fascinating and kind of terrifying ethical push and pull between experimenting on patients and the need for progress. This hit home most strongly with children fighting Leukemia in the 1960's [?]. Doctors were literally dosing sick kids with poison--the beginnings of chemotherapy--having very little idea of the effect. It would cause horrendous side effects and possibly increase their lives by a month. On the one hand, these kids were dying and this was their only chance. What doctors learned here contributed to an increased understanding of cancer and hopefully more lives saved in the future. On the other hand, these were kids already suffering a horrible fate. Is it ethical to increase their suffering for the slim hope of a cure? For an extra month? I don't know.

I was very impressed by this book and I learned a lot. Considering the content, it was not as dark and depressing as I feared. However, my anxious stomach still ached at points, and there are many haunting stories of suffering people. I would recommend this remarkable book, but only if you're interested in the subject matter.

#32 (2014/CBR6) "Hyperbole and a Half" by Allie Brosh

Unlike the rest of the world, I had not heard of Allie Brosh or her blog until I saw the spate of reviews of her new book, Hyperbole and a Half: Unfortunate Situations, flawed coping mechanisms, mayhem, and other things that happened (2013) on Cannonball. To be honest, I wasn't sure I was going to like it when I first heard about it. It looked a little weird and potentially unrelatable, but the reviews were so wholeheartedly positive that I didn't want to be left out anymore.

After a lengthy wait at the library, I was finally able to pick up a copy and all my fears of disliking an immensely popular book were put to rest. Brosh's book is a unique kind of biography, talking about absurd, funny, and meaningful times of her life with simple illustrations in comic strip fashion with short explanations that go along with them. Each chapter is separated by different-colored background, and Brosh discusses such varied topics as her dogs, her grandmother's birthday party, her procrastination and lack of motivation, and her struggles with depression.

From the reviews I had already seen, I was expecting something funny and unique, which this book was. However, what took me by surprise was the great writing in her short, explanatory sections. I'm afraid that I'm going to overrun this review with terms like funny, unique, and insightful, but there's no other way to describe it. I loved her tone and her choice of words. Even in the serious sections about depression, there were funny parts. I was going to quote something of hers from her "Motivation" section because I loved her descriptions, and I felt like she was describing me. Unfortunately the book was overdue back at the library, and I returned it in a rush, before I had a chance to go back and copy all my favorite quotes.

I loved Brosh's stories about her dogs and the goose. I loved the stories about her unique perspective on childhood, and I loved her descriptions of her problems with motivation and procrastination. I couldn't relate as well to her take on depression, but her comparison to the dead fish was a fantastic description. Brosh is honest and funny and her book is definitely worth reading. Funny, unique, well-written, and insightful.

#31 (2014/CBR6) "American Savage" by Dan Savage

I jumped immediately from What Do Women Want? by Daniel Bergner to American Savage (2013) by Dan Savage. I took it as a sign that Savage's recommended reading in his introduction included What Do Women Want? I felt very prepared.

Dan Savage is someone that I've heard of but didn't really know much about. My friend had told me about his sex podcast, and I'd heard about his books. I'd definitely heard of the "It Gets Better" program, too, but I can't say for sure whether I even knew that Dan Savage had started it before I began this book.

Anyway, I assumed that Dan Savage would have a lot to say and that I would probably agree with most of it. And I turned out to be mostly right. Savage discusses sex, cheating, gay marriage and equal rights, Obamacare, sex education, and other pertinent issues. He's funny, engaging, and his book is thoughtful, entertaining, practical, and easy to read. I didn't agree with him on everything--more on that later--and at times it could feel a little self-important--that Savage was using his book as a platform to redress every slight done unto him by his critics. However, I enjoyed reading it and I'm probably going to be looking for more of his books soon.

I could go on and on about all the smart, good stuff Savage says in this book. His views on what sex education should be and his coherent and emotional arguments for gay marriage and equal rights were very moving and persuasive. He had me in tears when he described the jubilant couples and cheering that surrounded the first, official gay marriages in Seattle at City Hall. It's good stuff. I think I most enjoyed the more personal stories about his life, and I'm very interested in reading the book about when he and his husband adopted their kid.

However--and again, I find myself a surprised defender of monogamy--but I did not agree with Savage when he says that cheating is okay. I don't mind what he seems to have with his husband, an agreed-upon "monogamish" relationship. They sound like they're happy and comfortable with their sex lives. But I can't condone cheating when it involves keeping secrets from your spouse. Sure, he only advocates this for some more extreme examples where one partner is simply not interested in sex anymore. I see where he's coming from, but I think honesty is always more important than sex. Also, personally speaking, I know I'm not the most knowledgeable on this subject since my long-term relationships tend to be on the short side, but I've never been truly tempted to sleep with anyone else while I've been in a relationship. And I can't share. I don't want my partner sleeping with other people. Even the idea of it makes me very uncomfortable.

Finally, I have some nitpicking issues with some of Savage's arguments. I agreed with his conclusions, but I noticed a number of times when Savage compared statistics from a northern and southern state. For instance, Savage compared the teen birth rates of Connecticut and Mississippi (I could be misremembering exactly which states he used, but you get the idea). Connecticut teaches birth control and Mississippi teaches abstinence only. Not surprisingly Mississippi has a higher teen birth rate. However, this is a correlative connection and not causal. Also, there are a million differences between Mississippi and Connecticut that might also be affecting teen birth rates. Savage seemed to use these studies to show a causal connection, which doesn't fit with the evidence he presented. Again, although I agreed with is conclusions, I hate sloppy statistics.

P.S. Savage mentioned in his book that his husband looks "very good" in leather. I happened upon some pics of his husband in a photo shoot for some slinky swimsuits when I googled Savage for this review. I concur. I imagine that Savage's husband looks good in anything.

#54 (2013/CBR5) "How To Be Black" by Baratunde Thurston

I'm not sure when I first saw How To Be Black (2012) by Baratunde Thurston. I'm pretty sure this book must have popped up on Amazon at some point. I was drawn in by the simple, striking cover and intriguing blurb:

"The Onion's Baratunde Thurston shares his 30-plus years of being black, with helpful essays like "How To Be the Black Friend," "How To Speak For All Black People," "How To Celebrate Black History Month," and more, in this satirical guide to race issues--written for black people and those who love them. Audacious, cunning, and razor-sharp..."

Thurston has an easy-to-read and thoughtful style of writing that I appreciated. He brings up some details of his life while he discusses what it's like to be black in America. In order to get a wider perspective, he brings in his own panel of "experts"--mostly friends he's met through his work, including the white Canadian and author of "Stuff White People Like."

My favorite parts of this book were when Thurston simply discussed his own experiences. I wouldn't mind reading an entire autobiography from him. Although I found the opinions of the panel interesting; they were too short and I didn't know enough about the authors. I couldn't keep them straight in my head, so I didn't have a clear through-line of who thought what as I read.

Although this book was written tongue-in-cheek, I found it kind of depressing. Mixed in with some of the annoying, at-least-kind-of-racist people I've had to work with lately, I've never felt so hopeless about race relations in America. Thurston really got the idea across of how exhausting it is to be a minority, with so many expectations and stereotypes hemming him in from all sides,--especially when he was the extreme minority in the corporate world. Yet Thurston isn't a negative writer at all, and he ends with a very hopeful and pragmatic chapter on his ideas for some real change.

I also found Thurston incredibly relatable. He's only a couple years older than me. He attended Sidwell Friends School (Chelsea Clinton's school) before getting an undergraduate degree from Harvard. He has the smart, thoughtful, the-world-can-change-just-let-me-explain-how attitude that I've decided those schools try to instill in all their students. And being an extreme minority in my current job, I could also relate to Thurston's description of being the only black guy at work. Anyway, I had highlighted tons of text while I was reading, but the library stole my e-book back before I was able to write this review, so I guess I'll just end it here.

#52 (2013/CBR5) "The Boys in the Boat" by Daniel James Brown

I was immediately drawn in by the cover of The Boys in the Boat: Nine Americans and Their Epic Quest for Gold at the 1936 Berlin Olympics (2013) by Daniel James Brown, on display at my local bookstore. I've never gone to a school that had a rowing team, known the experience of rowing on the water, or even seen a rowing race in person, but my ex-boyfriend was a very serious rower for quite some time. In fact, he taught me good rowing technique on the rowing machines at the gym. So, even though the sport of rowing is foreign to me, reading this story still felt very personal--like I was getting a better understanding of the life my ex had before I met him.

Although my ex may have been one reason why I picked up The Boys in the Boat, the reason I kept reading was because it was fascinating--exactly the kind of non-fiction book that I love to read. It was detailed, historical, and well-researched, but with a page-turning flow and focus on the real lives and struggles of regular people. And all the action took place within the context of world-changing events, including: the Great Depression, the Dust Bowl, and the rise of Germany before World War II. The rowing was suspenseful with descriptions that made it understandable and interesting for rowers and non-rowers alike. Not only did I learn a lot about the prestigious history of rowing in the United States, but I was thoroughly entertained as I learned more about the boys that came together to make an unbeatable team.

Brown begins and ends the story with Joe Rantz, whose life, if it were depicted in a movie (and this book screams to be made into a movie), would be considered too dramatic and unbelievable. Abandoned by his family at an early age, in the middle of the Great Depression, Joe Rantz depends on himself and manages through determination and incredibly hard work to survive and get into the University of Washington. Brown follows Rantz in his freshman year as he goes out for the rowing team, his freshman races, the struggles during their sophomore year and the team that finally gelled their junior year. Interspersed throughout are  details about the economic struggle during those years, the famed boat builder George Pocock, and the rise of Germany as well as American's attitude's towards the country before, during, and after the Olympics held there in 1936. If you look deeply enough, every person who has made it to the Olympic level has a fascinating story to tell because you can't get there without both incredible struggle and triumphs. Brown focused on one person, and then one team and told their story while allowing the historical details and context to hint at all of the other amazing stories going on at the time. I really liked this book, probably my favorite non-fiction of the year so far.


***SPOILER***
I just had one complaint at the end of the book. Brown discusses how Don Hume, the stroke man was deathly ill the day of the gold medal race. In fact, Hume lost it during the race and almost fainted. But there was no resolution after the race. I was desperate to see if he was okay, but all Brown said was that the boys (except for Joe) went out and celebrated until 4:30 a.m. Did Hume go out and party with everyone? Because, if so, he couldn't have been as sick as Brown suggested. It was frustrating not to know.

#48 (2013/CBR5) "The Bedwetter: Stories of Courage, Redemption, and Pee" by Sarah Silverman

Apparently memoirs of successful female comedians is a new favorite genre of mine. Good comedians are, by necessity, smart, funny, and insightful, so I tend to find their books worth reading. And even though I think getting up on a stage and telling jokes to a crowd of strangers would be the ninth circle of hell, I usually find something relatable in their stories. Besides Sarah Silverman's video, "I'm fucking Matt Damon" and seeing her on late night once in awhile, I didn't know too much about her or her work coming into The Bedwetter: Stories of Courage, Redemption, and Pee (2010).

Silverman's book is quick and entertaining. Every story and anecdote about her life is short and she jumps quickly from topic to topic before any boredom can set in. Silverman starts with her family and some unique childhood traumas growing up, she goes on to discuss starting stand-up, losing her virginity, her job at SNL, her work at The Sarah Silverman Program, and being Jewish. Although Silverman discusses some very personal details of her life, she avoids discussing her relationships in any detail--only mentioning some ex-boyfriends in passing. But Silverman is trying to entertain, not bare her soul to the world, and in this she succeeds.

Although Silverman tends towards the outrageous at times, my enduring impression is of her intelligence. When it comes to debating an issue, Silverman argues eloquently and thoughtfully. Silverman also mentions feeling bad about the jokes she told about Paris Hilton and Britney Spears on MTV. Although she is a comedian and making fun of people is a major part of the game, those specific jokes did not happen quite as she expected.

Two more random, but oh so important, points: I loved when Sarah Silverman talked about Louis C.K. Ever since I watched him doing some stand up recently, I've had a major crush. I was glad that Silverman's interactions with him did not require me to stop liking him. And finally, I would like to thank Silverman for standing firm against her publisher and refusing to use "pee pee" in the title instead of "pee." Who wants to read a book that sounds like a child's potty training manual. I don't know where that publisher was coming from, but dying on that hill was a good idea.

#16 (2013/CBR5) "How To Be A Woman" by Caitlin Moran

I first discovered How To Be A Woman (2011) by Caitlin Moran back when it wasn't really available in the United States. I wanted to read it right away, but  I waited until it was available at my library. Now that I've finally gotten around to reading it, it seems to be one of the most read books on Cannonball. I guess that makes my review easier. Since everyone's already read and reviewed it, I don't have much to add.

According to Wikipedia, Caitlin Moran is a British broadcaster, TV critic, and columnist at The Times. I had never heard of her before reading How To Be A Woman, but this book is more about what Moran has to say than her public figure. Moran discusses growing up poor and unpopular in Wolverhampton, England as she opines on feminism and other issues often faced by women, such as: high heels, Brazilians, handbags, pornography, strippers, and abortion. Moran has strong, clear, well-thought out opinions, and she comes at each of her topics with enough humor that even if I disagreed with her, I could still understand her point.

Moran's chapter on abortion stuck with me more than any other subject. She courageously discusses her own "bad" abortion, why she chose it, and how she feels about it now. I am very much pro choice, and I try to avoid the judgment that is often thrown at women on whether they should get an abortion or whether that abortion is really justifiable. I feel strongly that it is impossible for the government, or anyone else, to stand outside a woman's life and tell her what is best for her. And so much of that judgment tends to be centered around controlling a woman's sexuality. If a woman is raped, then it's not her fault, but if she's a "slut," she should face the consequences of her actions. I hate that. But at the same time, I can't pretend that having an abortion is easy or that it doesn't mean anything. I think about my friends who have been trying to get pregnant and how much finally having a life inside of them means to them. Moran began her own story imagining who the child inside her would grow up to be, and I was disappointed that he [her child] would never get any of those chances. Moran was very happy with her decision, and I completely agree with her on bringing unwanted children into the world, but it still sounds like a difficult process. Her husband was red-eyed, and afterwards, Mo
ran said she was going to get the best fortress of birth control in order to avoid going through that again. I don't think you can just say that abortions are meaningless medical procedures. It's a significant decision with significant consequences.I think it would be good if we could avoid the need for more of them.

Moran is smart and passionate, but she is not a social scientist. Her opinions are based on her life experiences and intuition. If you're looking for trends, or facts and figures showing how women have been changing in the modern world, you won't find it here. How To Be A Woman is a thought-provoking, personal story with one woman's viewpoint of feminism. I'd definitely recommend it.

#13 (2013/CBR5) "Beyond Belief" by Jenna Miscavige Hill

I find religion kind of fascinating: why people are drawn to it; different beliefs; how religion affects society; whether religion in the world does more harm or more good. For myself, I was raised as a protestant Christian by a mother who regularly went to church and a father who made fun of the ridiculousness of prayer. The peak of my religious life was in middle and high school when I was involved in some church youth groups. But I am a very idealistic, all-or-nothing kind of person. If I were going to be religious, then I would believe with all my heart and dedicate my life to it. Instead, the hypocrisy I saw around me was disillusioning. I eventually discovered that as much as I wanted the comfort of believing in something bigger than me, directing my life and watching out for me, I would have been lying to myself. I kind of avoid labels, but I guess now I'd probably call myself an atheist. I am moved by the natural beauty and power of nature, by beautiful music and art, by selfless actions of others, and even by other people's spirituality. But I see just some of the suffering that's in this world, and I think that if there is a God, this God would be dealing with some of that hopelessness before caring about my trivial problems--especially who wins Grammy awards and the Super Bowl.

As far as organized religion, I'm not a big fan. I know there's a positive feeling of community in belonging to a church and many churches do important charity work, helping others in need. I like this stuff. My mother now belongs to a very nice church that focuses on helping others and not on telling people what to think or believe. I'd almost want to join it myself except that I still don't believe in God. What I don't like is that it seems the more powerful the church, and the more hierarchical, the more time and energy is spent on consolidating power, and the good stuff gets pushed to the side. Now, I've heard bits and pieces of the crazy that is Scientology, but I've always been a little fuzzy on the details. After having read Beyond Belief: My Secret Life Inside Scientology and My Harrowing Escape (2013) by Jenna Miscavige Hill (with Lisa Pulitzer), I think Scientology is on the far side of the power-grabbing spectrum of religion--although a cult may be a more accurate term.

Beyond Belief is the very personal story of Jenna [Miscavige] Hill, the niece of the current Scientology leader David Miscavige, and her life growing up and eventually getting out of Scientology. Jenna's parents moved to Los Angeles and became members of the Sea Org when she was only about two years old. After the move, Jenna rarely saw her parents. And when she was moved to the "Ranch" at about six years old, she saw them even less. Hill presents a pretty harrowing picture of Scientology that involves tearing families apart, manipulation, controlling behavior, manual labor, and more. Because Hill was a part of Scientology since she was a child, she had almost no knowledge of the outside world, she was afraid of Wogs (non-Scientologists) and didn't realize for a long time that there was more out there and she could think for herself. Because of her uncle's high standing in the church, a lot of pressure was put on her to keep up the family name.

The ridiculousness of it all was pretty overwhelming: the stupid, controlling rules--no cell phones or television, the hierarchy, the stuff with the cans and e-readers. I sometimes felt like I was reading a science-fiction novel rather than a true account of something that just recently happened in the United States. A surprising page turner, I ended this with an appreciation for Hill's strength and courage; this was definitely a book worth reading.

However, in some ways this book left me with even more questions. Because this was a personal story of what happened to Jenna Miscavige, it did not give much detail on the beginning of Scientology or L. Ron Hubbard, why people are drawn to it, how those e-meter things are supposed to work, why people would join the Sea Org, or more information on the differences between the Sea Org members and public Scientologists. In addition, I often wanted more information on Jenna's story. What were her parents thinking when they basically gave up their children to become members of Sea Org? I imagine this still might be a sensitive issue in the family with unresolved guilt and anger on each side, but she could have delved much deeper on many issues.

In addition, Beyond Belief sometimes felt a little short on emotional detail and explanation. When Jenna meets her future husband, she says that he's cute. When they're not allowed to marry for months and months, she says they were frustrated and eventually had sex out of wedlock. Perhaps it's unfair to demand a baring of your soul from anyone who chooses to write about their life, especially when that person was forced to expose every aspect of their lives in humiliating detail through forced "security checks" and audits. But this book did sometimes feel more like a dispassionate recitation of facts than a real glimpse into someone's thoughts and feelings.

#5 (2013/CBR5) "Moonwalking with Einstein: The Art and Science of Remembering Everything" by Joshua Foer

I have to memorize all the streets in my city, all nearby hospitals, and all thirty fire stations for my final test to get off probation. I think that's why Moonwalking with Einstein: The Art and Science of Remembering Everything (2011) by Joshua Foer caught my eye. I love reading stories about people trying new things, I'm fascinated by how the mind works, and I figured I might pick up some helpful hints for my own memorizing challenges along the way.

Joshua Foer attended the U.S. Memory Championships to write up a short article on what it involved. After meeting some of the people, he decided to look into it more closely and went on to enter the U.S. championships the next year. Foer details his experiences for his quest to become a memory champion as he also explores various topics related to memory.

I'm not sure if it's just that I've been so busy and stressed lately that I have less patience, but I found this book rather frustrating. There were certainly good parts: the story of Foer's training and the actual competition was fascinating. Some of the tidbits I learned about memory were also very interesting. But after the initial excitement of learning about these worldwide memory competitions and how they work, Foer padded the narrative with unnecessary tangents. I think Foer was trying to write a personal account of his experiences and be a journalist at the same time and it didn't work. I wanted more personal detail and thoughts on his experience and training, but less personal opinion when he was discussing his research. His judgment on some of the memory crowd that were not in his new clique of friends showed through in a way that felt less than objective.

The techniques people use to accomplish these amazing feats of memory truly is amazing, and Foer discusses the "memory palace" and converting numbers into memorable images. But just as I was figuring out how it all worked, he just stopped. Foer initially learned to memorize a list of 15 items by placing them in his head in his old childhood home, which he described in detail. But that left me with a ton of questions! Isn't there a limit to how many items you can put in your house? What do you do when you want to memorize more than 15 items like they do in the memory championships? Isn't there a limit? Doesn't memorizing a bunch of random information over and over again make all your memory palaces so cluttered with images that you can't remember anything? What was it really like?

But Foer had moved on to a [much longer than needed] discussion of the history of memory, what Socrates thought about memory, how the development of books and printing presses changed the need for memory and what that means for us. Foer also discussed education and whether rote memorization should be used for teaching. I felt that I read at least 100 times that people used memory palaces to remember things and these days no one needed to remember anything anymore. Foer also goes on a little tangent to [possibly] discredit a memory savant and look down his nose at Tony Buzan for successfully commercializing these memory tricks. All of this felt tangential and superficial. I felt that if Foer really wanted to get into these topics, he needed to dig a little deeper, give me some more detail, and really prove to me what he's professing.

Finally, the last thing that frustrated me about this book is that it all felt so pointless. Once I learned the minimal insights of how our memory works best and the tricks the memory champions use, I couldn't figure out why people were spending their lives memorizing images to go along with numbers to win this one, little-known competition. People are spending their lives trying to one-up each other, but they're not learning anything new or creating anything. It's a frustrating waste of talent. Foer and his new memory pals all seemed to be mid-twenties, living with their parents, yet able to travel and party internationally while snubbing their noses at those memory gurus trying to make a buck from the whole enterprise.

Now that I've made it to the end, I feel that this review may come across more negatively than I intended. Besides the middle, which seemed to drag, I really did enjoy the beginning and end of this book. I definitely learned something, and I might try out some of the techniques Foer discussed.

FAVORITE QUOTE: "I consider the law to be a zero-sum game, and therefore a pointless use of a life...Being good at being a lawyer means merely, on average, maximizing injustice."

#23 (cbriv-2012) "Wild" by Cheryl Strayed

"The thing about hiking the Pacific Crest Trail, the thing that was so profound to me that summer--and yet also, like most things, so very simple--was how few choices I had and how often I had to do the thing I least wanted to do. How there was no escape or denial. No numbing it down with a martini or covering it up with a roll in the hay. As I clung to the chaparral that day..., I considered my options. There were only two and they were essentially the same. I could go back in the direction I had come from, or I could go forward in the direction I intended to go...And so I walked on."

I started reading Wild (2012) by Cheryl Strayed exactly when I most needed it. I'd been in the fire academy for about two months. I was completely exhausted and burned out. My mind was buzzing from stress, and I hadn't read anything that was not fire related since before the academy started. But then there came one blessed three-day weekend where I didn't have quite as much fire reading as usual. So I took advantage of my unusual free time and spent most of the day in bed reading Wild.

The escape of reading after so much stress felt wonderful. But my temporary vacation was even better because Wild was an intense, well-written account of young Cheryl Strayed's life. Strayed was twenty-six, recently divorced, lost after her mother's death, and falling into drugs when she decided to hike the 1,100-mile Pacific Crest Trail from Southern California to Oregon. Woefully unprepared and overpacked--she had never really backpacked before--Strayed details this memorable and moving journey.

Even though I could not personally relate to everything in Strayed's life, she tells such an honest account of her actions and feelings, that I felt for her through all of her struggles. Fortunately I was reading this book alone because I could not keep it together when Strayed wrote about her mother, her family breaking apart, or her mother's horse. It was heartbreaking.

I could also relate, and take strength from, how Strayed persevered through her lack of knowledge and preparation to overcome the trail and learn from it in the end. Even as I read, my hips were still aching and bruised from the straps on my SCBA (air pack). It was almost refreshing to read about someone who had it worse--and whose hips were in worse condition than mine. In addition, both Strayed and I were struggling in environments with which we had very little experience and that were dominated by men. It was incredibly refreshing to read about another woman pushing her boundaries and succeeding. Not only did this book give me a much needed mental rest from the fire academy, but it also gave me inspiration to keep going even when it sucked.