#43 [2025/CBR17] Dream State by Eric Puchner

Dream State (2025) by Eric Puchner is another book that I can't remember how I discovered. I don't know the author, and I've never read another book by him. But at some point I saw it, and it seemed interesting enough to put on hold at the library. I enjoyed reading this book. Both the people and their problems felt real, and it kept my attention throughout. Spoilers ahead.

The book begins when a young woman, Cece, comes to Salish, Montana, a small touristy town, in order to finish the preparations for her wedding. Cece is marrying Charlie, and the wedding is taking place at his family's summer cottage in Salish. While there, Cece meets Charlie's best friend and old roommate, Garrett, whom Charlie has asked to be the officiant at their wedding. Garrett has been through some struggles. He had something of a breakdown after the death of one of his best friend's in college. He quit school and is working as a baggage handler at the local airport. In addition, Garrett's father is dying of cancer.

Cece is initially put off by Garrett, but they spend some time together before Charlie comes up to meet her and something happens. Despite most of the wedding party getting Norovirus and whatever deep connection Cece and Garrett have, the wedding goes on as planned. Afterwards, Cece is too ill to fly home. And then she never leaves. She leaves Charlie for his best friend, Garrett, staying and building a life with him.

The book continues to follow Cece, Garrett, and Charlie as they have kids and grow older. After many years, Charlie forgives Cece and Garrett for the betrayal and loss. The two families spend a lot of time during the summers together in Salish. But Charlie still has a strong underlying layer of grief and want when it comes to Cece. He may see her as the one that ruined his life because his relationships are not successful after her.

And unlike the movies, Cece's life did not turn into happily ever after when she married Garrett. She loves him, but they struggled for money. Also, Garrett spends a huge chunk of his time up in the mountains studying wolverines. She had bigger dreams than waitressing in a small town with life a constant struggle.

    She'd always imagined she was special, destined to do something original with her life, maybe even becoming someone great, and this, ironically, was what had drawn her to Garrett in the first place. Running away with him, as far as she'd thought about it consciously, was meant to be part of  this becoming. And yet what had she become?

As they grow older, the children have their own lives and problems as the adults start facing some of the problems of old age. In addition, the summers in Salish become more and more unbearable as climate change causes heat and smoke from fires to increase exponentially.

What I liked most about this book was how Puchner wrote realistic relationships. Everyone in this book makes a mistake at some point, but they do their best and continue living. The relationship between Garrett and Charlie and Cece and Charlie was especially interesting after their betrayal. It was even something to see how it affected their children. In addition, Garrett and Cece really felt like a good, loving couple, but they had their struggles. I loved reading about the little moments that made their lives better. Recommended.

#33 [2018/CBR10] "Love Warrior" by Glennon Doyle

I swear I found Love Warrior (2016) by Glennon Doyle on NPR's List of Best Books, but I just went back to check and couldn't find it on the list. So now I have no idea where I found it. Love Warrior is a memoir of a life and a marriage. Glennon Doyle grew up in a loving family, but she had Bulimia since she was a child. As she grew older, she also became an alcoholic. Getting married to Craig Melton and becoming a mother was a turning point in her life. She sobered up and she focused on building the perfect family.

Doyle's seemingly perfect family was shattered when she discovered her husband's pornography on the family computer as well as his infidelity. She'd focused her life on taking care of her kids. Suddenly she did not have the support of her husband, and she could see the pain she was causing her children. All of her life, Doyle had run from her problems, avoiding and refusing to feel the pain and loneliness that we all go through at some point. But this time, Doyle faced her problems. She went to therapy, allowed herself to feel pain, and worked through a lot of issues with her husband. Doyle also changed her relationship with God and religion, making a more personal relationship with God instead of blindly following the narrow roles prescribed by her church. In some ways, this book turns into a self-help book where Doyle explains what helped her get through her crisis.

There were many things that I liked about this book. Doyle is a good writer, and I admired how she honestly discussed her Bulimia, alcoholism, and downward spiral in high school and college. She ended up in a mental hospital as a teenager, and it was one of the few places she felt safe.

However, some aspects of the second half of this book didn't work as well for me for a number of reasons. Perhaps most disconcerting was that I googled Glennon Doyle after I began reading because I was curious what she looked like and what she was doing now. I discovered that she is now married to Abby Wambach, a retired, women's soccer superstar. I thought that was interesting, and I kept expecting her to address it in her book--perhaps even as an explanation as to why her marriage was so difficult. But that never happened--Doyle wrote the book before she met (or at least got serious) with Wambach. The narrative of the book was solely focused on being brave and saving your marriage against all odds. It felt like something was missing. Doyle found a way to forgive and live with her husband again, but even with all the talk of honesty, it seemed that she had not really addressed the problem.

During the breakdown of the marriage, I found myself most often feeling sorry for her husband, Craig. I did not forgive his cheating or lying, but he did not ruin a perfect marriage. Even before they were married, they could not talk to each other and Doyle hated sleeping with him. They'd never really spent time together sober, and the only reason they got married was that Doyle was pregnant again and decided to keep it. It's a horrible recipe for a marriage, and it is no surprise that it didn't work out. But Glennon was attacking Craig like he was the only one at fault, which didn't seem fair--although I do appreciate the honesty in which Doyle described their interactions.

Finally, I am not a religious person, and I can sometimes get frustrated with too much talk of it. I like Doyle's eventual take on religion where it's all about love and a personal relationship with God. However, I could not stop from rolling my eyes when she pretends that her decisions are God's will. Just take credit for your decisions. I don't understand how people can pretend that God is telling them what to do.

After an entire book about her husband's betrayal and how they worked out their problems, Doyle leaves him for another woman. It feels like a large part of the story is missing. Doyle never liked sex, was this because of bad experiences? Was it because she was a lesbian but in denial? Doyle has always been religious. If she was attracted to women when she was younger, did the inevitable guilt and denial going along with that contribute to some of her problems growing up? Was she in denial when she was younger or did she honestly develop an attraction out of the blue to Wambach? Despite reading so many of Doyle's honest confessions, something still felt disingenuous about her memoir. At least right now, Wambach appears to be the happy ending and true partner for Doyle. It would have been a more interesting book to see how she got there.

#24 - "The Story of Edgar Sawtelle" by David Wroblewski

I heard of The Story of Edgar Sawtelle (2008) by David Wroblewski through some surprisingly diverse channels including the Pajiba review, my father, and Oprah. The fact that all three sources liked and recommended this book is even more surprising. The only thing I knew about the plot was that it had something to do with a boy and some dogs, but I’ve always liked animals and the three separate recommendations had me putting it on my “read as soon as possible” list.

First, I have to definitively reiterate what I’ve heard from other sources about reading the book jacket before reading the book. I just happened to look over the book jacket again when I was about halfway through reading it. Having had just read the last 200 pages with tense anticipation and wonder and worry, I was astounded to see the main plot details thrown out in a couple of wasted sentences on the side of the book. I’m sure readers could still enjoy it having read the spoilers, but I sincerely believe the less you know going in the better.

Thus, I will skip any discussion of the plot, which actually isn’t even as important as the characters of the book and how they think and act and interact. I haven’t read a novel that drew me in so completely in a long time. I got so involved with the characters, that it was hard for me to put the book down. Edgar Sawtelle is a boy who lives in rural Wisconsin on his family’s farm where he and his parents, Gar and Trudy, breed and train dogs. Edgar was born mute and communicates primarily with his own version of sign language. The story follows Edgar but also delves into the lives of his mother, father, and some other characters that have a presence in his life. But a number of important characters are also the dogs in Edgar’s life. Now, I’m a dog lover, but Wroblewski manages to bring the dogs’ personalities and mindsets alive in a credible and captivating way. In short, Wroblewski made me believe in and care about the characters, so the actions that affect them throughout the story really mattered to me.


SPOILER PARAGRAPHS:
I was so engrossed in the characters, without a clue of what was going to happen, that I was actually very surprised when Edgar discovers that his father was murdered and the murderer was Claude. When I first started Part II of the book, entitled “Three Griefs,” I was thinking the three griefs would be the deaths of his father, his mother, and his wonderful dog Almondine, leaving him alone in the world. Obviously, I was anticipating a drastically different novel, but when I finally read that Edgar’s uncle had murdered his father and moved in with his mother, I realized it had to be based on Hamlet.

The part of the book I related to the most, however, was the relationship between Edgar and Almondine. Wroblewski managed to capture an incredibly strong connection between the boy and his dog. Their comeraderie and companionship was constant and reassuring, so whenever they were separated, I worried. Edgar also had a special relationship with three of the dogs whom he had trained from birth: Essay, Timber, and Baboo. Essay was smart, determined, and independent. Timber was high-energy and a little flighty, while Baboo was stable, patient, and loyal. I enjoyed the interactions between Edgar and these dogs as well, but Almondine was always Edgar’s true partner.

I was a little dissatisfied when I finally finished the novel, but I think this was mainly because I wanted more. I still had unanswered questions. I couldn’t figure out why Essay left with some of the dogs, where they were going, why they had to leave, and how they wouldn’t starve. I’m still not sure of the importance of the stray dog, Forte, in the story and why Edgar lured him back to the farm in the end. And I think that Edgar’s mother finally understood everything that happened, but that isn’t completely clear. And I certainly wouldn’t have minded if the story went on for a little bit longer, so I could find out what happens with Edgar’s mother, the sheriff, and the Sawtelle dogs. But just the fact that I’m still thinking about the book and wanting more shows what a powerful story this was for me.